Even though I could hardly wait for The 69 Eyes to come to Croatia, madness that overtook me after they left was even greater… and mixed with desperation. What if I don’t see them again for a year and a half? What if years pass before we meet again? This reality I must come back to every time I get blessed by this music I adore is getting heavier on my back. Is it because of the passing of years or the realisation that almost nothing lasts forever? Nothing… except my deep devotion to this band, whom I, with all the tremblings of my dark heart, also refer to as ‘’the band of my life’’.

Several months of preparation and promotion, and it all came down to January 24^th, 2010. The guys came and everything around me became dream-like. Hanging out before the show with them and my vampire sister Ivy, interviews… everything passed in a matter of minutes - that’s how it looked to me. And when the show started, I wasn’t really aware that that was it, the point everything came down to: eternal music, hearts to hearts in a crowded hall, sweat and blood spilt for a night of perfection… The fans around me all cried out to the same chant, and in them I saw a reflection of myself from all these years – the light in one’s eyes at the sight of Helsinki Vampires on stage. The magic that can never be explained or understood by the rigid rules of cruel reality. The magic that lifts all the sad souls up, an eerie sort of energy (vampyric?) flowing through everyone in front of the stage and on it. It doesn’t matter how often I hear these songs live, they sound and feel each time more intense, more vivid – I was surprised at the feeling of tears right beneath my eyes when “Dance D’Amour” started. The whole concert was an event not to be missed, from Jyrki’s trademark moves on stage to Jussi’s flirting with the drumsticks… all this I’ve experienced before, but here, with all these fans from Croatia and Bosnia, it was that more special.  These people have waited a long time to come to this show, and I felt lucky to have been able to see The 69 Eyes live so many times, despite all the bureaucratic chains and documents and visas… Anthems such as “Wasting The Dawn”, which was dedicated to The 69 Eyes Croatia, “Lost Boys” and even the newer ones – “Dead Girls Are Easy”, carved their way into my mind once again, scorched my heart once more, heart that was ready to burst after everything.

Never will I have enough words to say, or write, what I feel for The 69 Eyes. I realise this now after sleepless nights trying to write this damn review. They have my heart in its totality, that’s what is clear to me. I would travel the whole world just to take a glimpse at these guys, to hear one single song I would cross oceans. No distance is too far, no price is too much. The beat of this heart inside my chest beats in the rhythm of their melodies, and a sigh that now escapes my lips is always born after I hear Jyrki asking me “some kind of magick… do you feel it?” on my stereo, for the thousandth time…

I always have the same thought after lights on stage dim and our vampires dissapear… “if death would come knocking on my door now, I’d say ‘welcome’”. But there was still some words unspoken and so I climbed the stairs to the backstage and spent some more precious time with Bazie and the rest of the guys. Hope arose that years will not pass until I see them again, and so Ivy and I said goodbye to our dear guests in the middle of a cold January night, passing hugs and some mementos for them so they never forget how much they mean to us. All that is left is for me to try to express my deepest graditude to Jyrki, Bazie, Archzie, Timo and Jussi for all these moments I hold as priceless gifts, gifts that shine when the night falls the darkest. I will own the night because you are in my heart, together with me. I will own the night until next time, my darlings!